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Whats goin on.. [09 Nov 2006|10:53pm] [ mood | amused ] [ music | incubus - anna molly ] well, here it goes. id be lieing if i said im not enjoying life right now. althought there are always those challenges that you have to go through. seems to be the same things often enough. ive been thinking about my dad lately. but theres nothing i can really do with that situation. or rather, i feel like im getting back at him for not doing anything about it, which im sure is completely wrong, but that's where im at right now. guess im just hoping he gives me a call someday, soon. enough with that tho. i have some enjoyments going for me. im enjoying my own place very much.. great change, great feeling. should be getting a new car soon, dream car? yes. well a substitute version until im a millionaire, ha. there is something i feel im missing tho. i havent had a "girl" in a while.. of course those randoms, but what does that do? its usually when youre drunk, which leaves me with an awkward feeling the next day, not an accomplished one. who knows... maybe ill find a cool lady to hang with and maybe exchange something or two. maybe ill meet someone at work, well that could be bad. who knows. that's something thats going pretty well too.. costco is a pretty cool place, never thought id work there.. maybe thats why it happened. hopefully ill be able to keep it up with school while i tack on more hours in that world of wholesale. well, bascially, ive been having a pretty damn good college experience so far. i enjoy the friends ive made so far, and am optomistic about what's to come. 2 . deserve this

Lately. [06 Mar 2006|09:34pm] 1, i need someone 2, 3, 4, i need to change. 12 . deserve this

Wonderland [05 Mar 2006|01:08am] It will be a year in april. this past year has been most definatly the craziest year of my life. So much has happened, and so much is continueing to happen. I'm going to be gone in less than 6 months. I can't wait to move out but i also feel so unprepared and resentful from leaving. i think i have my work cut out for me. 6 . deserve this

[10 Jan 2006|07:52pm] The result of two chemical reactions in separate organs brings existence into reality. This creates the ability to create more reactions which intern designs the ability of thought, and desire. these machines can create their own desire. Of course this is not a perfect science, these machines also tend to create a chemical reaction that is known as imagination. This imagination blinds them, but also motivates. Catch 22 you could say. But the ability to see their options and then choose, yes the ability to choose what one does with it's time, is one of it's most incredible accomplishments. Their options: ranging from education, to physical dominance, to skill. These individuals, as they call themselves, claim independence, but really are all under control of one another. Each imperfection or retardation is almost an evolution, which makes it increasingly difficult to determine the outcome of the series. what? deserve this

"They call me the budda man" [08 Jan 2006|08:23pm] -I didn't realize that what happens in my life and yours has to become the business of everyone else. I didn't say anything, didn't scowl your name. I didn't cause any false assumptions about you, and you what you were thinking. Just because you were afraid of humiliation doesn't mean you have parade around the campus telling everyone your side of what happened between you and i. It seems as thought you tend to break and panic when fear comes into play. I realize though, i can't expect anything more from you. I can't expect any dignity or respect, nor will i receive any such action or thought. Although you are showing your immaturity and adolescence, i will put it past us once your through with this little charade your having fun with. deserve this

[04 Jan 2006|10:24pm] This is a lesson of procrastination. Everynight im seemingly racing the clock. You're as helpless as a joke; and this is almost over for you. These inconsistant fase of my moods; creating this hidden bete noire. No one really has to know about this but of course; there is no alternative. Oddly enough, those similar sights and notifications of the season or title are reassuring: what has gone from wanted/expected to a neccessity. What will it take you to admit that you were wrong? You have just been taught that in the end it's always the same. Just remind me to never act this way again. and hold that breath of yours. * deserve this

new years [31 Dec 2005|09:10pm] So this new years is one that i would rather not remember. tonight i HAD a fake ID, but ended up with an MIP and possesion of a fake ID. its great sitting at home. doing nothing. feeling so negative. fuck the police. but besides that. i think im pretty much over getting into shit. This was the "last straw" so to speak. i have a couple new years resolutions.. and tonight deffinatly finalized them. damn. this sucks. 2 . deserve this

[20 Dec 2005|09:02pm] I feel as though I've almost forgotten how to write. I don't know what's really going through my head these days. I think it's time to reconcile. And then just listen to holiday songs and enjoy the season. P.S. if you need to get some christmas shopping done, check out HAUTE MONDE high fashion off of Imperial and La Palma. Located in the Cinema City shopping Center next to knowlwoods and boardwalk. 1 . deserve this

[10 Oct 2005|08:21pm] So, how much more of this have you remembered that you had rather not? Maybe it's just that you're that one, that one that went away. and there's nothing stopping it, eeven though it still doesn't feel different. It's one of those things that one day just hits you, and you don't know where the hell it came from. It's those shirts, pants, and watches that you used to try on but never buy, because we all know what they're all about, and who would want that anyway, right? That one question keeps repeating and making me go crazy over the fact that i know i've known you before, and now i'll forget. you're a memory that's so real i'd rather not. deserve this

[01 Oct 2005|12:52am] Everyone screams hippie at me because i wore a shirt that said antiwar pretty big.itwas a statement type of shirt. i don't think im a hippie.anyways'&so what ifidont likewar' 6 . deserve this

[17 Jul 2005|12:50am] ( Elevator Songs ) 4 . deserve this

[15 Jul 2005|12:27am] [ mood | shitty ] ( Some of the greatest people in our lives are taken from us... ) 1 . deserve this

[14 Jun 2005|09:54pm] so as of now im listening to these sad songs. im crushed and imagining us together, cuddling close, making out. i miss your touch, i miss your laugh, your kiss, i miss taking you home. i miss your small hands. but as for now im going to sit around and dream of these days that are sadly but truly gone and done. woah.. wait.. summer? are you ready? 2 . deserve this

[07 Jun 2005|08:33pm] Like totally bitchen. Summer is going to be ridiculous. ha. holy shitr. 6 . deserve this

[30 Apr 2005|05:32pm] 17,4,28,88 16 . deserve this

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